Suffering a major case of ‘the brain farts’….


Aaaaaarrrrrrghhhhh. WHAT was I trying to remember?!!!!! C’mon brain, I know it’s in there *somewhere*…….

‘Brain Fart’- When you are attempting to remember something very obvious, something that you know you should know. This feeling often leads to head banging and hair pulling- Urban Dictionary.

Help! I’m being plagued by brain fog, recurrent mental block, clouding of the conciseness, loosing mental clarity, an inability to continue a train of thought. Name it what you will: Lately, I’ve found myself suffering an incredibly baaaad case of the brain farts.

I’m not talking about the brain farts we all know too well, & encounter on a daily basis, like;

‘WHERE are my bloody (sun) glasses? I KNOW I put then down here somewhere. They were here a minute ago. Oh, there.they.are. On my head’


Getting your brain to engage with your mouth when taking a sip of tea, but instead of it actually going into your mouth, the majority of it ends up going down your chin/ tshirt, & you resemble a 6 month old- minus the bib……

& We’ve all been there when we introduce ourselves to a MVP (most valuable playa) as ‘ Oh, hi there. Nice to meet you. I’m MUMMY’ – Promptly willing the ground to open up & swallow you whole……


You’ve ended a super professional phone call with, ‘Thank you, take care. I LOVE YOU’.- Instantly thinking, ‘WTF, did I actually just say that?’. YES, yes YOU DID.

Nope, I’m not talking about these (for the most part) innocent & hilarious fluff ups. The brain farts I’m referring to are a little like this: For the last year, I’ve been finding it incredibly difficult to remember certain things & actually get shiz done.

Let me explain. With this little blog of mine, on some days, a ‘one liner’ will pop into my mind & I think ‘THAT’S it. That right there, is THE blog post of the year. *The* money spinner’ & I feel totes smug with myself, sure it’s a masterpiece set to propel me into overnight internet stardom. The creative juicing are flowing, I’m on a roll baby. Only, I go & ‘effing forget this brilliant idea come the next day, the ability to retrieve these thoughts from within my brain evade me.

I can find myself massively motivated & passionate to ‘create’ something, this could be along the lines of an awesome & uplifting campaign, or making something crafty in the kitchen/ around the house, to find myself thinking the next day ‘Er, what was I going to do again?’

& There isn’t a problem with my memory, I can assure you, I have the ability to retain the most random pieces of information. I could recite for you every lyric from any Destiny’s child song, circa 1999, ‘cause you a bug a boo. you buggin what? you buggin who? you buggin me! & don’t you see it ain’t cool’. & Anyone remember Alanis Morissette, Blasting the ’95 vibes….‘Coz I got one hand in my pocket, & The other one is givin’ a hi five’ (If ever that song was made for anyone, it was me *virtual hi fives all around*.) I digress, but you get my point……

I can remember something so minuscule & insignificant about someone I’ve only met once, like their favorite food, or their favorite holiday destination. Actually, at times, my memory recall has creeped people out a little, caused them to be on edge (I’m a bit like an elephant. I NEVER forget).

So then, this is why I find myself feeling increasingly frustrated, because my major brain fartage tends to happen when I sit down in front of my laptop to write something. My mind just turns to mush. All my rad ideas evaporate into thin air, & creating a masterpiece goes by the by (& I end up writing the word BRAIN FARTS).

Admittedly, I feel slightly distracted by my 101- things-to-do-&-ever-growing list. & To be fair, I have got quite* a lot going on in life right now, that perhaps this could be more of a motivational thing, & my energies are more importantly focused elsewhere (*if you call moving to Australia, quite a lot?!)

I’ve also been on various medications this year, that have knocked the wind out of my sails, leaving me completely exhausted. So I guess this could have some baring on how enthusiastic I feel to sit in front of the laptop tapping away all day & night. Sometimes, we all need to take time out.

Is this just me being unrealistic in regards to the expectations I place upon myself, with how much time I can dedicate to everything, I ponder.

It can’t be baby brain, as lord snotface is approaching 4, so that old excuse won’t do anymore…

I know that a whole host of factors play a part in the regularity & severity of my brain farts: Sleep depravation, distraction, basically anything that can affect my physical & cognitive health will increase my brain farts.

What do we ALL do when we’re slightly worried about our health? We consult Doctor Google, of course. So, here are some facts I found which eased my concern over my mind flatulence…..

1) The Brain prioritises long term memory over short term memory- so that’ll explain my spectacular ability to recall song lyrics then…..

2) The brain makes room for more important information to maintain it’s efficiency. A new study even suggests that our memory has a ‘just-in-case-file’ storing trivial information for later, which explains why we forget words, which we don’t use regularly. My Solution? Read a thesaurus every night before bed. Nothing like a little reading eh?

Now if you’ll just excuse me whilst I go & type google into google. Oh wait, What was it I was searching for again?

My brain is experiencing technical difficulties, please stand by…………..



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